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Editor and Publisher: Teresa Proudlove
Issue #045 January 3rd, 2008

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These 768 words will take less than two minutes to read. Read on for thoughts on 'Is Your Path Chosen?'

Table of Contents

1. The Sandwich Generation

2. The Path Chosen

3. Thank God You Were Born!

4. Wishing You a Blessed New Year

Dear Friends,
Firstly, I would like to apologize for the lateness of my December e-zine. Not only did Christmas and daily life fill my world but my aged father fell, breaking his hip. Now, nearly three weeks later - after surgery, a grim hospital stay, two near death seizures my father continues his bed ridden journey in his nursing home. I ache seeing the last of human dignities stripped away. Playing the piano, walking and toileting himself are not possible now although, hope of recovery remains. Why, you may ask do I write such dismal news when this newsletter is supposed to offer hope and inspiration?

I write of this because I know many people are in my situation. The boomers called the ‘sandwich’ generation with teens in the house and ill or dying parents, has taken on personal meaning for many of us. Imbedded within these daily trials lies a poignant significance shaping who we are, who we are becoming and layering our life with meaning.

Upon returning home after a day of watching my father teeter between life and death, I turned to my daily journal for reprieve. Journaling the mixed bag of emotions, trials, miracles and revelations within each day is great life work. After writing about witnessing my father’s suffering I glanced at a line written atop a page of my journal: “If I could choose any path now, in what direction would I head?”

Irony pinged my soul. For months now I’ve sat with this self inquiry - no doubt fuelled by the ending of the workshop I’d led for fifteen years. How ironic asking, what path would I choose when it seemed my path was chosen for me. Right now my main focus continues to be about supporting and loving my father on his last journey here plus, going with my husband to visit his aging mother, and being available to travel to tournaments with our son in Grade 12. For a moment I felt choice less and wondered, “How often are our paths chosen for us?” Of course, I could rail against this all and ‘go my own way’ but then I would not be true to what I value most.

In this moment I am reminded that there are forces at work in our world much bigger and wider than we know which affect us and call to us. Choosing a path is not simply about, “What do I want?” but perhaps, even more so about “What does Life or, for me, God want?” This reminds me of the classic movie “It’s a Wonderful Life,” with Jimmy Stewart I watched yet again this Christmas season.

Here is a man ready to commit suicide because he is about to lose his business and sees his entire life as a failure. His past hopes and dreams of becoming an engineer of grand skyscrapers and world travelling are long dead. Instead he’d remained in his small home town marrying and having a family; and taking over the loans and mortgage business from his dead father thus allowing his brother to fulfill his dreams. An angel comes to help Bill Bailey (Jimmy Stewart) in his suicidal moment and grants his wish – that he had never been born. Then Bill finds himself back in his much changed small town as an unknown stranger – seeing how many lives were ruined and fraught with suffering because Bill Bailey had never lived.

It is deeply moving seeing how one simple man, living a humble life shaped the lives of many other people in big and small ways. How very sad and different lives were and indeed, the small town itself, in the reality wherein Bill Bailey had not been born. This is also true of you and me.

Those moments when our teens are angry and spiteful, when our aging parents’ suffering seems more than we can bear, when we are stretched by the demands of work and life, we’re clearly being called upon our path. Even if we haven’t built skyscrapers or travelled to exotic places at Christmas but have done our best in each moment to be kind, true and generous we walk a path of great meaning.

Here is wishing you a Blessed New Year grounded in being present to the daily ‘small’ things which add up to a life well lived.

Warmest regards,

Create the Life and Work You Love!

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© Copyright 2007 by Teresa Proudlove of Your Lifework Enterprises • yourlifework.com