Living with Passion before You Die

My Purpose: I work with people who want to make a difference in the world and to live with passion before they die -- but they are not quite sure how to achieve it -- or simply have not had the time to process their thoughts and desires, until now.

When my mother turned 40, my siblings and I ran through the neighbourhood announcing it to the world. I’m not quite sure how she felt about that, but I do remember her telling me that even though she was now 40, she still felt the same inside. She also impressed upon me that even though I felt like time moved very slowly as a child, that once I turned 40 myself, I would realize how little time I actually had left and that time would speed up. When I did turn 40, I revisited that thought and realized how true it was. That realization caused me to abandon my government job and choose life on the west coast instead. I knew the ocean was calling me home, but I didn’t know why.

My government ‘spin doctor’ work was never fulfilling for me. I wrote about endless ‘initiatives’ for bureaucrats who exhibited none. (Every Press Release had to have the word initiative in it.) I knew there was more to life than this and that I had to find or create meaningful work for myself. This took me down the path of career counseling and self-employment, which soon transitioned into retirement coaching. I knew my work had to touch and connect with others at the heart level. If your work or your life doesn’t make your heart sing, it’s not your real purpose in this world. We are here to make a difference in the lives of others. Our journey is to discover and share our gifts. Sometimes this becomes our paid work; often it’s just who we are.

I’m a little concerned about my generation – the Baby Boomers. We seem to have it all. We certainly want to have it all – but what I see we have the most of is stress. Sometimes we medicate ourselves with material wealth. We don’t realize that peace of mind can never be bought.

We desperately need to slow down, check in with ourselves, and get away from the constant barrage of media hype and incessant interruptions by the technological wizardry and gadgets we’re addicted to. Constant interruption from others plays havoc with our ability to access our own thoughts.

Go on a technology diet for a while. Feed yourself with nature instead. Our real knowledge comes from the Earth. We talk about the seasons of life but do we really understand what they mean? Mid-life is our third season and it is when we should be getting ready to harvest the gifts we have sown through sharing our talents. It is the time just before we scatter our seeds of knowledge and return to the earth through death.

I’m afraid that plastic surgery, hair dye, botox and our search for eternal youth is robbing us of the real gifts we have at this age. Spending endless hours clinging to our youth may also enable us to hang on to the naiveté of that age for longer than is good for us. I’m certainly not against remaining healthy and vigorous and as good-looking as possible for as long as we can. I just don’t want us to paint the outside and find an empty box inside.

I’ve met many people -- clients, friends and family members – who have not yet reached their potential and are still searching for the answers somewhere outside of themselves. The answers are always within. You just need to take the time to slow down and listen.

When I speak with fellow Boomers they tell me they plan to work forever – whether that work is fulfilling or not. When I ask them why, they tell me it’s because they can’t afford to retire, unless they get an inheritance or win the lottery. It’s quite amazing how many actually do plan on winning the lottery. The movie The Secret might be partially responsible for this type of magical thinking.

When I ask what they need the money for, it’s almost always more things. Even real estate agents are surprised at the number of Boomers who are actually upsizing to their ‘dream homes’ in retirement. Boomers are trading the 1,500 square foot home they raised a family in to a 3,000 or more square foot home with all the bells and whistles they can find on eBay. And of course, you can’t park a ratty old car outside your new home, so that needs to be upgraded too. The banks must be overjoyed at the success of their advertising campaigns!

You might want to have your Monday morning wake-up call be a recording by the group, Five For Fighting. In one of their best-known songs, they repeat the line: “When you’ve only got 100 years to live…” 100 years is probably generous for most of us. If you haven’t been exercising properly or eating nutritious food, it’s likely less. If you’re currently in your 50’s, even if you only look 30, how much time do you truly have left? And more importantly, what do you intend to do with that time?

My suggestion is to work backwards. Let’s say you intend to travel to exotic destinations, learn to play a musical instrument, paint a watercolour, write a book or make a difference in the world. At which age do you intend to do this? Work backwards by decade. Will you do this in your 90s, 80s. 70s, 60s or 50s?

You can take time now to map out the rest of your life – or you can turn the page – perhaps there’s a bejeweled coffin just waiting for you on eBay. The choice is yours to make.

Either way, you’ve only got 100 years to live.

For more information, you can contact Jan at: (250) 247-9929 OR visit her Web site: www.FitForRetirement.ca